#fuckmeright

The pursuit of comedy is not like the pursuit of happiness.

Imagine the exact opposite.

#depression

Ok. So imagine what you perceive to be happy. Like what you see in the movies. That bullshit, right?

Suffocate that, slowly... and not in an (hot) autoerotique asphyxiation sort of way. Like, Wal*Mart belt that comes attached to your $12.95 sun dress. It's a failure waiting to happen.

#ifthatswhatyoureinto

Literally imagine everything that you care about falling apart, because you're self-sabotaging yourself. Just shit on everything, whether metaphorically or literally. Actually, literally. That's basically the equivalent.

Got it?

Actually though, I'm not doing that. I kinda got my shit together lately, got a grown up job and moved in with a great guy.

So... um... I have nothing to write about

#happinessblows

#BECAUSE

I thought this [writing] project was going to be fun.

It isn’t.

It’s tedious.

I find myself constantly behind, especially since I’m working on a presentation piece for work, in addition to trying to perfect the set for next Monday’s show. As if that’s possible?

That’s just part of life – doing things we don’t want to, though. It’s not even a part of growing up because even as children we’re forced to do things we don’t want to.

“…because it’s good for you,” That might be the second most infuriating phrase followed by, “because I said so,”

Because is a shit word. Of course, it’s Middle English and Old French. Thanks, Google.